Ok. . .kids are in school, Abete has returned to Vernal (until Thursday to get ready for the wedding) and I am sitting here with time to finally blog. Yet, I don't really know where to start. Various events over the last month have truly made me evaluate who I am and who I have fostered relationships with or surrounded myself with.
Reflecting over the last six months to a year, I see the people I once considered valued friends really were not as important to me as previously thought. I witnessed someone I trusted, compromise their integrity in a way that gained them nothing. The end result only tarnished their reputation. In another instance, I trusted and almost compromised my future for the idea of happiness. However, after much soul searching and many mistakes, leading to pain and anguish, I realized when someone asks you to compromise those fundamental parts of you that define who you are, they really don't have your best interests at heart. (This was a very painful lesson.) Satan makes the "idea" of happiness very tantalizing.
I have learned more about who I am and what I want from these experiences. Looking myself in the mirror and liking who I am, matters. Sometimes the outcome is painful. It may hurt financially (this I know for sure). It may be lonely (this I know for sure). Then the rewards come. They are not always immediate.
The differences I have seen in my life arew priceless. Abete came in to my life in August. This blessing is like trying to count the apples in a seed. My children are flourishing and happy. My relationship with my ex-husband is amicable and the boys benefit from this everyday. I have developed friendships with women in my ward that are closer to my heart than I have ever experienced. I am thrilled to draw closer too my family members and strengthen our sibling bonds. Ultimately, I am yielding more to the promptings of my Father in Heaven. I am learning more about the gospel of Jesus Christ and how to implement it in my life. Through Abete, a new rich culture has been opened up to me.
Friday after New Years we had the opportunity to attend a Fiji Community activity in Lehi. That afternoon we took the kids to Lava Hot Springs and by the time we got home from that, both Betz and I were physically drained. The pools are invigorating but boy do you want to climb out of them and right into bed for a nap. We would be driving straight down and turn around and come right back. But we felt it was important to support this activity and a great opportunity for me to meet the community before the wedding. I am so happy we went.
The people were engaging and welcoming. It was fun to watch the youth dance and play. Then the adults even got out there. Seeing Abete with his fellow Fijians is rewarding. These are a warm, happy, generous people. I love the slow rhythm of their music. I love the kiss on the cheek to say hello. The feeling of community and family is strong. I am grateful for the wives and how they offer me tips and encouragement as I navigate this new culture.
As the new year begins, I am filled with hope and peace. I revel in the family I am to have. The next year will be full of learning, growth, challenges, joy, laughs, tears, and most of all love (and hopefully some continued weight loss).
Happy New Year to all!! I look forward to what this year will bring.
1 comment:
hey! i meant to tell you when i first read this post that i really touched me. i hope things are going great for you... you said everything beautifully! it's almost time!!
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